Now that your engaged, it’s time to choose choose your bridal party and decide who will be standing next to you when you say your I-do’s.
To choose your bridal party is quite the chore. You don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings or forget anyone along the way and it becomes challenging to narrow it down. But this is supposed to be a time of celebration! The last thing you want is to be all bugged down and stressed out about something that should be a thrill.
After planning so many weddings, we have seen the “choosing your bridal party drama”. It truly is an emotional rollercoaster because of there are so many peoples feelings you need to take into consideration. So in order to keep things positive (and keep everyone happy), we have some advice on how to decide who makes the cut.
All emotions aside, let’s choose your bridal party…
- Make a list – First and foremost, you should make a list of every single person that you could even fathom being an option. Whether that be 5 people, 10 people, or 100 people, write it all down. That way you can have it all out in front of you and you don’t forget anyone.
- Decide your number – There are pros and cons to having a big or small bridal party. For example, the bigger the bridal party the better your shower and bachelorette party will be, the more fun all of the pre-wedding events will be, and the more the merrier of course! And having a small bridal party is friendlier to your budget (after all, bouquets and — add up quickly) and easier to manage. So you need to decide which end is best for you or where to meet in the middle.
- Family first – Once you have your number decided on, it’s time to start pulling from your list. We recommend always starting with family because they are forever! Include your brothers and sisters, and maybe even your fiance’s siblings. If you are very close to a cousin or step sibling, be sure to include them too.
- Friends second – Between sorority sisters and fraternity brothers, your home town friends, and your co-workers, the possibilities are endless. The best way to go about this is to choose friends who are responsible, good at providing emotional support, and has been there for you through lots of ups and down (because there might be a few pre-wedding meltdowns!)
- Don’t ask just because they asked you – Just because someone asked you to be their bridesmaid, doesn’t mean you should feel the need to ask them. They had their own reasons for asking you, and you have your own special reasons for selecting your group – and they should understand that. After all, odds are they will be at the wedding supporting you no matter what.
- Explain your expectations – This is YOUR wedding and YOU’RE the boss – we don’t want this to turn out like Bridesmaids and have the whole thing turn to disaster. Let them know upfront what is expected from each of them and how you plan on communicating, as well as any important dates you may have planned.
- Find other roles – Once you have your list set, you are going to have a few stragglers that you are feeling really guilty about not including, but just don’t want to include them! Maybe set them up with some other important roles so that they feel included! Maybe reading a quote at the wedding, ushering, candle lighting, singing a song, or even attending some pre-wedding fun like tastings!
Choose your bridal party carefully! After all, this whole process is supposed to be about you and your happiness, so don’t let bridal party drama get in the way. Once you make the final call on your bridal party, gift giving is next!